Saturday, October 07, 2006

The Power of Nice

by Dale Shumaker
4spirit@gmail.com

The Power of Nice by Linda Kaplan Thaler and Robin Koval is about how to conquer the business world with kindness. Short and to the point, it shows that nice is a spirit of strength and not a concession to weakness. It is a powerful force when lived out sincerely in the business world.

The authors own The Kaplan Thaler Group, ranked as one of the fastest growing advertising agencies in the U.S. Being in an industry noted for its cut-throat ways, their treatment on how "nice" is "power" is thought provoking. After the first peruse through their book, I found myself thinking on this concept and consciously applying it more throughout the day. It was making a difference even on the short term. Nice becomes contagious and you start a chain reaction among your own encounters in the day.

Being Nice Benefits.
A few benefits of nice according to Linda and Robin are "being nice and placing other people's needs on the same level as your own will get you everything you want."
"Nice is luckier in love." Low key caring type people have fewer divorces.
"Nice makes more money." In positive nice-filled workplaces, studies
revealed more increases in revenue.
"Nice is healthier." Volunteers, who do good, live longer than those who don't.

The Six Power of Nice Principles
1. Positive impressions are like seeds.
What you do that is nice is like a seed. Over time it is likely to grow and spread and you will see the fruit of it.
2. You never know
Some people you are nice to without knowing who they are, "you never know" who you may be talking to and what the outcome may be. Sometimes you will be surprised who you were nice to, or what happened in a chain of events from that person that eventually came back to you.
3. People change
As life goes on people change... who they are, what they do and where they may come into your life again. So who you are nice to now may be someone very strategically important to you later.
4.Nice must be automatic.
If it is not who you really are, and it is superficial, it can have a reverse effect. Insincere nice is as bad as not nice. The true test is your spontaneous reaction to something and if it is a natural sincere response of real, honestly caring about the person, who ever it is, you are being nice to.
5. Negative impressions are like germs.
Like the nice seeds that grow and produce nice fruit in the future. Negativity festers like a bacteria that brings disease to your life later on. Be extremely conscious about the environment around you, and don't infest it with un-niceness.
6. You will know
In some cases, many miles from home, you could be rude or un-nice to someone you think you may never meet again. But you will know and it will affect your subconscious thinking on other things. Nice knows the truth and you will know.

These two nice girls continue with other ways being nice has a powerful influence in all you do. You can make a bigger pie by helping others get their share (work others into your deal), pool resources (customers,contacts) and expand your team, spread the wealth (being stingy is not nice when so many help), share the credit (all ideas, successes include parts of others; give others credit too). By making the pie bigger, more people are included and the better off you are.

Help your enemies. One interesting approach is not to “get even” when some are not nice to you. But instead help those not nice to you. Linda and Robin share instances where a competitor was using "not nice" methods in competing for the same client. They responded by avoiding criticism, and not talking down the person. Instead they stuck to putting their best foot forward and doing their best work and letting the client judge. They were nice to their competitor regardless and even complimented true strengths.

This attitude and approach is making them stand out from the pack because it is a fresh breath of air in a sometimes vicious, highly competitive world. It is gaining for them the fame and fortune they are now experiencing.

Nice guys (girls) do win... LInda and Robin are proving that. For more on being nice check out
http://www.thepowerofnice.com/
and these nice girls' website
http://www.kaplanthaler.com
The USAToday review:
http://www.usatoday.com/money/books/reviews/nice.htm

It is so amazing how the theme on being nice in the Power of Nice reflects the principles of kindness as a core expression of those who live by Spirit. The principles of kindness are the power of Spirit and it carries a power stronger than words. It can change the hearts of the hard hearted and heal the emotions of the dejected.

Being kind to someone when you yourself are down cast in your own emotions, heals one's own emotions.

An idea has circulated in our culture on doing random acts of kindness. It is powerful and has a ripple effect on ones own emotions and the emotions and actions of others.

The Apostle Paul in letters to several fellowship groups of Jesus Way kept pounding on this point. He said numerous times:
"Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)
"Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love." (Ephesians 4:2, NLT)
"Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." (Colossians 3:12-13, NLT)

The origin of kindness is in love.
"Love is patient and kind.” (1 Cor.13:4)

Kindness is the essence of who God is, the very character, nature of God's Spirit.
It is who God is. God is Love (1 John 4:18).

Those who allow His Spirit to control their very being, their mind, heart, emotions are of God's Spirit. Kindness is all of these actions.

Love is Spirit, God is Spirit, God is Love.

When we live in God, in Spirit, in Love, we are kind.
It is who we are.

Not an intellectual awareness, but a lifestyle of spontaneous, inadvertent response to what is going on around us. When Spirit is us, kindness is us.

It creates a reciprocal effect in our actions,
a ripple effect to all we do, in all our dealings with everyone... both the important and unimportant people. In kindness, there are no unimportant people. It ripples everywhere, from everyone, to surprisingly delightful conclusions.

Just being unkind to one unheralded employee can cause a ripple affect throughout a whole company. And it will unexpectantly come back to you. But when something bad happens, you may wonder... where did this come from. But then think of the last time you may have been unkind, to even someone unknown by others. (You may have thought it was an unknown act of unkindness.)

Being kind to the least in your associations can create a positive ripple effect throughout the whole mass of people... in and outside of the organization. We ripple to others what just happened to us last.

We can create positive ripples of kindness. The best way to create this effect naturally, is to be it. Be a kind person.

You must have God's Spirit in you, dominating you, the preeminence of you.
Be Spirit. Be kind. Be Love.

... and then it will almost effortlessly move from you and then surround you. The benefits of nice will be there.

The response to anything should first be... "I will be kind"
and then go from there.

Be Spirit,
and you will be kind... automatically!

"Be kind, tenderhearted, forgiving in the same way God has forgiven you."

Being nice, being kind, loving people is Power!

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